Giving up on dating and relationships

I ranted to my friends until they couldn’t take it anymore. He said okay, mewed an apology and insisted we keep seeing each other. The shock came from the fact that I had taken such pains to clearly articulate what it was I needed, had invited him to have an open conversation and then ended up being entirely disregarded. Alongside the wage gap and the emotional labour gap, the antics of softboys, f-ckboys, fading and ghosting constitute a pronounced communication gap. Regardless of whether the circumstances involve just hooking up or the potential for a relationship, men are ignoring what women are asking for.

Later the same week, when the brother of a man I’d slept with months before invited me to a games night attended mainly by people who were strangers to me, I went. People of all genders are guilty of bad behaviour, but women are taught from childhood that they need to monitor and be responsible for other people’s feelings. They don’t care if we get off, and they don’t care if our feelings get hurt.

Without knowing it, we all have defenses in us, based on hurtful past experiences, that can now operate to push love away.

So, when it comes to deciding whether to call it quits on a relationship we once valued, the first things we have to ask ourselves are: half of the dynamic.

In the end, I was single and more confused and tired than ever.

It’s taken me a long time to even admit this to myself much less to you, so please know that everything I’ve written here is true.1. The first video shows you why “Comparison is the enemy of contentment“, next you’ll learn “How to make the most attractive men fall for you“, and finally “What you can do to find love“. I’m Debra Fileta, Professional Counselor & Author of True Love Dates, and I created this blog as a space to pair psychology and Christian spirituality to address all things love, dating, and relationships.This month, I’ve invited some of my faithful True Love Dates readers and subscribers to share their heart with the rest of our blog community for my #Guest Post Series!!I’m so excited to hear their stories and share their messages with you as well! And be sure to leave them some love in the comment section below.— Love, Debra One year ago, I gave up dating, and it changed my life.

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